That’s up to you to decide.
In this week’s Torah portion Joseph finally reveals himself to his brothers and says “"I am your brother Joseph, whom you sold into Egypt. And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that G-d sent me ahead of you. For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no plowing and reaping. But G-d sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So then, it was not you who sent me here, but G-d."
Joseph could easily have seen himself as victim, sold by his jealous brothers, but instead he chose to see himself as an agent of G-d on an important mission, one with tremendous potential. By framing events in this way, he freed himself from an emotional prison of anger, resentment, frustration and victimhood.
There is always more than one possible interpretation of what happens to us and we have the ability to choose between the different interpretations. (According to the most up-to-date scientific research, none of us experience objective or true reality as it is, instead we each create our own version of reality. Our brain interprets reality the way it chooses to. Watch this TED talk for some examples.)
In the words of Rabbi Jonathan Sacks, when facing challenge, ask yourself “What does this bad experience enable me to do that I could not have done otherwise?”
Why choose a negative interpretation when you can choose a positive one?
Shabbat Shalom
Rabbi Benjy Silverman